When we talk about money, we often slip into the language of control: budgets, targets, forecasts, plans. It’s comforting to believe that if we just work hard enough at managing things, we can shape life exactly as we want it.
And to some extent, that’s true. Being intentional and disciplined with money does create opportunities and stability. But what if part of a healthy relationship with money, and life, also involves letting go?
This isn’t about giving up. It’s about recognising that some of the most meaningful things in life, love, health, opportunity, even good fortune, don’t always bend to our plans. Sometimes they arrive when we least expect them. Sometimes they never arrive at all, and something else comes in their place.
In our work as financial planners, we frequently observe this dynamic. A client meticulously saves for a dream home, but then their dream changes. Another builds a retirement plan only to discover they’re happiest working well into their seventies (and still playing golf and tennis!). Someone else pours energy into leaving a legacy, only to realise their children want to carve their own path.
There’s a powerful truth here: when we loosen our grip on how we think things should be, we create space for what could be.
That might mean accepting that the market won’t always cooperate. Or that an illness, job change or divorce has altered the path you thought you were on. It might mean grieving the loss of a goal, while also opening your eyes to something better; something you couldn’t have planned for.
E.M. Forster put it beautifully:
“We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”
So, what does this look like in practice? It might mean letting go of perfection and simply getting started. It might mean asking for help rather than trying to do it all yourself. It might mean adjusting your plan, not as a sign of failure, but as a sign of growth and honesty about what really matters to you now.
Money and life are not separate. Both ask us to balance control and surrender, to hold our plans lightly, and to stay open to change.
Where in your financial life could you soften your grip and allow something new to emerge?
If you’d like to talk it through, we’re here to help you see the bigger picture… and craft a plan that makes space for both your intentions and the unexpected turns along the way.